Kiwi Putt Putt

Current Conditions
Temperature: -21F
Wind Chill: -21F

I got a special invitation to Scott Base on Sunday to play on their home made putt-putt golf course. I was happy to be invited back after being a covert operative in their fire drill last week (I was smuggled in to pull a fire alarm while they were all accounted for at a base meeting).

There were eight holes set up throughout the base, all ingenious in their own way.

Hole 1: More like batting than putting, this hole used a ping pong ball and Bernoulli's Principle of Fluid Dynamics. Have you ever seen a water fountain with a ball that 'floats' in a vertical stream of water, even though you would expect it to fall out? Bernoulli figured out that pressure is inversely proportional to velocity, so the ball stays in the moving water because the stationary air holds it there with higher pressure. Anyway, Pete used this effect with air as a tee:

That ball isn't moving, it's just floating there in the air! The idea was to whack your ball into a hole in the chest of a robot costume. I'm using an iron because there were only a few putters available, making the game rather interesting.

Hole 2: Stand in the sauna ten seconds for every miss you made on the first hole (maxxing at 30 seconds), then tee off from inside the sauna and work your way towards the drain hole of the shower around the corner.

Hole 3: Using a battery-powered self-returning practice hole, aim your ball down a sloped hallway towards a jump and into a toilet bowl (hopefully).

Hole 4: Give 'er a whack up a ramp and onto the pool table. Any pocket will do.

Hole 5: Putt your way through the kitchen area, avoiding things like trays of Jello, cans of Spaghetti-Os, and Annie (who happened to be making coffee while we were putting):

Hole 6: The "Scheisseneimer" (shitting bucket). Putt around orange crap buckets and yellow pee bottles (these are often used in field camps) until you get your ball to roll down this ramp and into the shitter:

Your ball will disappear for a moment and suddenly roll out of the bottom of the bucket, but now it will be brown. The hole is a recessed roll of TP, on end.

Hole 7: Up the ramp and into the water hazard, then into the sand trap, then up another ramp into the hole:

Hole 8: Quite a contraption, this one:

Up the ramp. Then, if you're unlucky, the ball will come back down the right hand return and a burst of water will hit you as your ball rounds the corner towards your feet. If you're lucky, you saw the unlucky fellow go first and now you know better! A few more pipes and ramps and it's back to the bar for drinks.